A night ago, brother and I were out to buy some supper before watching heroes SE02EP01. We drove around uptown searching for any attractive bungkusable food of which we could get a quick bite, and we thought of some mee from Penang Mari in TTDI, so we turned around and headed there.

As I panicked at the sight of a surprise police road block in the distance, my brother insisted that it was nothing to be afraid of and calmed me down with a quick "JUST DRIVE LA STUPIBOI. There will always be three men shining torchlights to scare the shit out of you. Just sit back and show them your i.d. And also say terima kasih."

So we entered the queue through the one lane exit, waiting for the cars in front to get pass the check when it came to our turn. There were evidently 3 policemen standing there - one to blind the driver with a maglite an ask for i.d, one standing further in front to anticipate any getaways, and one behind to control traffic and open your boot.




There's just a quick lesson in conjunction with this festive season's more frequent police checks. It's called the Raya Pao-ings (Pao, as in to Tah Pao). Corruption goes very far just to earn a quick buck from you when your guard is down. They just have to catch a slight mistake of yours and they slap you with a big "SO?! how brudder? gaimana nak slesai skarang?"

So here's a set of tips to keep you a guilt-free and law-abiding citizen of Malaysia.

1. Seatbelts, P Stickers, and Road Tax



As simple as it says, always make sure that you have your stuff on your windscreen, and your seatbelt in the clicker. They catch you more off-guard nowadays. Some of the highway ronda come side-to-side with you, inches away, and peep at whether you've got your seatbelt on and that there are less than 4 passengers at the back.


2. Be Smart, Not Clever



There is still half of the Malaysian population who turn on their hazard lights while driving in heavy rain. It's quite clear that car lights that aren't permanent (blinking on and off) reduces ability of drivers behind to gauge distance between vehicles in a heavy rain condition. This would prevent unnecessary accidents on the road, thus minimizing the involvement of any officials. Meh.

3. Parking the Malaysian Way



Nowadays the tow trucks come around even more often then they are induced to, outside my college. As said, they just wanna earn a quick buck out of your carelessness, so be wise and make good decisions.


6. No need Fast No need Furious



Speeding is of course another nonessential. Well, driving too slow can also attract attention. So if you wanna have fun, go exhilarate yourself on the Karak Highway and not the North-South one, since they now have cicularisation e-mails of the speed cameras under the overhead bridges.


5. You Can Make a Difference



Lastly, make a decision not to tailgate. Nowadays I've been hearing a lot of stories of people purposely braking to cause a smash up with the tailgater, just for the fun of it. hahahahahaha the though of it makes me roll.


So remember to keep your head up this Raya as they will attack you in your slightest slack. Good luck!

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